3 posts tagged “forgiveness”

Timothy Keller

What is forgiveness? When someone has wronged you, it means they owe you; they have a debt with you. Forgiveness is to absorb the cost of the debt yourself. You pay the price yourself, and you refuse to exact the price out of the person in any way. Forgiveness means you free the person from penalty for a sin by paying the price yourself.

Forgiveness is a promise to not "bring the matter up" to the person, others, or even ourselves. At each point when we are tempted to exact payment, we refuse, and though it hurts, that is a payment.

- Tim Keller

Forgive

I've been thinking and reading about the issue of forgiveness recently. Most people would probably agree that forgiveness is a good idea, until of course they have been wronged unjustly or deeply wounded themselves. And then, to quote C.S. Lewis, "to mention the subject at all is to be greeted with howls of anger. It is not that people think this too high and difficult a virtue: it is that they think it hateful and contemptible. 'That sort of talk makes them sick', they say."  In the face of our enemies and those who have hurt us, our thirst for justice and desire for revenge, it seems, can be unquenchable.

Jewish holocaust survivor and Nazi-hunter Simon Wiesenthal tells of an encounter he had in 1943, while a prisoner at an Austrian concentration camp with a dying Nazi and SS member, Karl Seidl. Seidl had asked a nurse to bring him a Jew to whom he could confess his sins against other Jews. The dying man, from his bed, grabbed Wiesenthal's hand and confessed to helping to burn down a house in which more than 150 Jews (men, women and children) were trapped. Wiesenthal makes clear Seidl's deep sincerity, quoting him as saying, "I cannot die . . . without coming clean. This must be my confession. I know that what I have told you is terrible. In the long nights while I have been waiting for death, time and time again I have longed to talk about it to a Jew and beg forgiveness from him…  I know that what I am asking is almost too much for you, but without your answer I cannot die in peace." Wiesenthal stipulated that Seidl sounded truly repentant, truly haunted by his sins. He begged for forgiveness, but Wiesenthal said nothing and walked out. Seidl died the next day and left Wiesenthal all his possessions—but he refused to take them.

Wiesenthal wrestled with the morality of his decision for years, and later recounted his story in a book called "The Sunflower". It is hard to imagine the moral struggle that Wiesenthal must have went through, let alone the horrors and suffering that he witnessed and endured. I am in no position to comment on his decision, and must confess that I'm not sure what I would have done myself had I been in his shoes. Yet, I am confronted by the words of Jesus:

In stark contrast to Wiesenthal's story, is the story of Christopher LaPel and Kaing Guek Eav. Last week, the UN supervised trial of Kaing Guek Eav (aka "Duch" - pronounced "Dook") began in Phnom Penh, Cambodia - dubbed the "Killing Fields" trial. Duch is a former leader of the Khmer Rouge and is being charged for "crimes against humanity". The Khmer Rouge was one of the most brutal regimes of the last century. Although they only controlled the country for 4 years (1975-1979), they massacred about 2 million Cambodian people - more than 1/4 of the total population. Duch was one of the most notorious of the Khmer Rouge leaders, best known for heading the dreaded Santebal (the Khmer Rouge secret police) and running the infamous Tuol Sleng (S-21) prison camp (Now a "Killing Fields" genocide museum that I visited in 1994 - the experience which left such a dark and disturbing impression on me that I am still haunted by the images of that visit to this day). He was their chief torturer and executioner, and is accused of personally overseeing the systematic torture and killing of more than 15,000 men, women and children. Duch was very meticulous and kept very detailed records of all his prisoners, including pictures of each victim before they were tortured/executed - which are all on display at the Tuol Sleng genocide museum. He is the first Khmer Rouge leader to be put on trial since the communist regime was ousted from power more than 30 years ago. Four other former Khmer Rouge leaders await trial. Duch, now 66 years old, is the only defendant to confess and express remorse for his actions. Through his lawyer, Duch stated that he acknowledges the charges against him, and wishes to use the court proceedings to publicly ask forgiveness from his victims as well as all other Cambodian people.  He said to the victims, "I ask your forgiveness, I ask your forgiveness." 

Duch is now a Christian, having been led to Christ by a Cambodian-American missionary, Christopher LaPel, almost 15 years ago. LaPel, who was not aware of Duch's true identity at the time, baptized him in 1996. Duch had changed his name and was living along the Thai border as a teacher. LaPel described him as an enthusiastic member of his church who took meticulous notes and asked lots of questions. Duch was discipled by LaPel and became a lay pastor - later planting a house-church with 14 other families, and at the same time working for World Vision providing relief for refugee children. Eventually Duch was tracked down by a British journalist in 1999, and when confronted as to his secret identity, he confessed, saying "It is God's will you are here… I have done very bad things in my life... Now is the time to bear the consequences of my actions."  Days later, he turned himself into the police. LaPel had to personally come to grips with his feelings towards Duch. LaPel's own parents, brother, sister and other family members were murdered by the Khmer Rouge. His close cousin, a former science professor, was tortured and killed at Duch's Tuol Sleng prison - her photograph still hangs on the wall there today. LaPel, said: "I was shocked when I found out who he really was, because what he did was so evil."  In retrospect, LaPel says there were signs pointing to Duch's real identity. "Before he received Christ," LaPel recalls, "he said he did a lot of bad things in his life. He said: 'Pastor Christopher, I don't know if my brothers and sisters can forgive the sins I've committed against the people.' He said he felt remorse for what he had done to innocent people, adding: 'Thank God that the Lord forgives me.'" LaPel did not probe further. After his arrest, Duch was taken to his former prison camp Tuol Sleng for a pretrial investigation. At the scene of the mass graves ("Killing Fields") Duch broke down in tears, crying "I am sorry, I am sorry", and then knelt down beside a tree and prayed. LaPel described his last meeting with Duch in prison: "When he saw me, he ran to me, crying. He said, ‘I am happy. No matter what, I won’t give up the faith.’ I brought him a Bible, because they took the one he had. He told me he has been ministering in prison. He wanted me to have a service, and he invited three of the guards in to worship. And I prepared Communion and read Psalm 23: ‘The Lord is my shepherd.”  To this day, LaPel says he holds no anger towards Duch and has completely forgiven him.

"Forgiveness flounders because I exclude the enemy from the community of humans and exclude myself from the community of sinners. But no one can be in the presence of the Cross for long without overcoming this double exclusion....When one knows that the torturer will not eternally triumph over the victim, one is freed to rediscover the torturer's humanity and imitate God's love for that person. And when one knows that the love of God is greater than my sin, one is free to see oneself in the light of the justice of God and so rediscover one's own sinfulness."
- Miroslav Volf

Kaing Guek Eav ("Duch")